Sofie's Survivor Story
Posted on October 1, 2011
The story I would like to tell you this evening is by no means the worst abuse I suffered at the hands of my ex-husband. Sadly at the time I did not even realize it was abuse. It is the story of the day my two children and I fled our home. It is both a story of abuse and empowerment.
Early that Sunday morning my ex-husband asked me to step outside to “talk”. I refused knowing he never speaks to me with words. Something in him snapped instantly and he threw me down on the sofa bed. As my side slammed into the metal frame I hardly had time to cringe before he was on top of me pinning my chest down with his forearm yelling “you don’t know how much I love you”.
Our children heard him and came to help me. Our daughter 3 years old stretched her body over my head while our 8 year old son jumped on his own fathers back. His father elbowed him in the ribs causing him to fly backwards and into a rack of dvd's. My eyes did not leave my son as I watched him slump to the ground, and then with anger, fear and pain he stood up and jumped again on to his father’s back. Just as the rage appeared so suddenly it was gone.
Later that same day he said he was going out for a while. The kids and I went out back to play. When we came back into the house we found his truck in the drive way. My stomach sank as I walked to the front door our children at my side. When we looked out we saw my ex attacking the neighbor, he started back towards us throwing a large object in their yard. As he got closer he was yelling “ look what you made me do” words I’ll never forget - Pounded into my mind from a lifetime of abuse. Our neighbor distracted him so the children and I could flee. We ran to my son’s room and barricaded the door with his bed. Soon the pounding began and the door rocked the bed budged but we held it with all our force until it fell silent. Then seconds later he appeared in the window red faced eyes bulging my son shouted he was calling the police, and then my ex disappeared.
After he left my son began packing some clothing for him and his sister demanding “lets go mom lets go I’m not going to take this any more”.
We went to my parent’s house but were turned away - into the streets already night. My father, an electrical engineer for NASA, is an abuser as well and instructed my mother not to let us in. With my daughter crying to use the restroom, my mother gave me directions to Mc Donald’s, they would not even let her go in to pee. With nowhere else to go I parked my car two streets up from their house and called Laura’s House to begin the intake process. We were picked up the next morning.
I have been running my entire life from abuse, and fear. Always seeing my goals education, freedom come close but I kept hitting speed bumps falling skinning my knees bruising my skin. On that Sunday morning I felt my ankles crack and as I feel I lost all hope. But I did not hit the pavement instead I feel into the tightly wove arms of Laura’s House. They healed me and gave me a safe place a first home to learn how to set proper boundaries.
No more broken bones and bruises for me. Today I walk and I can see the roses around me. Though I still have a long journey ahead I know that someday I will get to stop and smell them. I will probably get stung by a bee with my luck .
Thank you all for supporting Laura’s House you helped to save our lives.
